Knowing why you’re just not getting the attention that you deserve when it comes to online dating is important. If you want to get a response, then you need to make sure that you’re prepared to understand what isn’t going on right in your messages and profile. If you can point out these flaws to yourself, you’re going to have a lot more luck later on.
A lot of guys out there just don’t know how to write their first message on a dating site. We know that it can end up being a daunting task if you’ve never done it again, but you do need to make sure that you’re prepared to tweak a few things if you think it will change your outcome. With our help, you’ll really be able to make a difference in how you write your messages online.
Don’t make it too long.
If you write a message that’s literally a small novel, that’s not going to end up standing out to her as something she wants to read. It’s just going to make her skim and roll her eyes, and that’s because it undoubtedly will come off as far too pretentious. She’s not going to want to know every single detail of your life; she just wants to have a brief introduction to you, and that’s going to end up giving her a lot more to go on than a novel about everything you’ve ever done would do.
We highly recommend keeping the first message you send out on a dating site to only about a paragraph. This means only 4-5 sentences max, and if you don’t end up throwing a question in there to make her interested in replying back, then you’re making a grave mistake.
This is a fine example:
“Hi, Marcy. I saw that you were really into running on the beach, and I happen to love the beach, too. I know, kind of random to get a message like that. Anyway, I know there’s a great restaurant down by the beach, so I’d love to take you out. If you’re interested, let me know.”
Don’t be too aggressive.
Being too pushy or using foul language in your messages will only end up deterring her, and that’s why you do need to be careful about how you speak to her on dating sites. You want to make sure that you’re always polite and open to her, and that you’re very willing to end up talking about her own interests just as much as your own. If you can’t do that, then you’re going to end up alienating her from the very beginning.
We also highly recommend steering clear of conversations about her looks if you’re just talking to her in the first message. If you have to comment on something, talk only about her eyes and smile. That’s the only thing that’s going to make you come off as someone serious, and not someone that’s just being a creepy guy on a dating site. You don’t want to drive her away from the very beginning.
These ladies are here to have fun, and if you aren’t going to immediately introduce a fun idea in the messages that you’re sending out, that’s going to end up making them feel like you’re wasting their time. Make sure to nail it.